The cornerstone of any relationship is effective communication. Things will go nowhere if both parties refuse to talk to and listen to each other. Communicating is the best way to see and reconcile differences between you and your partner. Here are a few tips to help you out in reaching out to your SO!
Relationship Communication | Listening, Not Hearing
1. Just Be Honest
— MadAboutMarriage (@MadAboutMarriag) October 8, 2017
As cliché as it sounds, honesty is definitely the best policy. Relationship communication hinges on the honesty you show your partner. You will not gain anything from hiding your concerns from your partner. Being frank and honest with them will make communication even better.
Of course, the truth can also hurt; and most of us would rather choose to hide it rather than face it. However, no matter what stage of the relationship you two are on, you have to face the music. Be honest with your partner and communication will come easy.
2. Timing Is Everything
LL Cool J dropped this great advice years ago and it’s definitely still useful today. He said, “Don’t make decisions when you’re mad.” With that said, the best way to communicate with the significant other is through proper timing.
Don’t talk things out when things are still fresh; wait for when you’re both calm and collected. You should avoid situations wherein one or both of you are busy or distracted. You will be more focused on pressing matters rather than communicating with them. Timing is everything, gents, and you need to learn it.
3. Wait a Couple of Days
There’s a thing called the 48-hour rule, wherein someone waits 48 hours to see if they’re still mad. It’s great relationship communication advice because you’d get to assess how hurt or angry you are. While honesty is important, it’s best to internally consider if you’re just being petty and annoyed at a simple thing.
Waiting two days to reflect about what offended you can make all the difference in communicating with your partner. Using this method helps you pick out the things that really matter rather than focus on the little annoyances you can’t bear living with.
4. “We,” not “I”
It’s important to note that when talking about differences with the SO, it should be in the context of “us” rather than “you.” Attacking your partner will no doubt be perceived as hostile and might make them go on the defensive side. Gents, this will not help anyone. The whole point of relationship communication is to discuss the differences between two parties.
It is not about proving who’s wrong and who’s right. Instead of saying, “You’ve been distant lately,” try “I feel we’re not as close as we used to be.” Remember, how you phrase your sentences during this time is important. Let your partner know that this is about the two of you, and not about them (or just you.)
5. Mind the Body Talk
— Eiza Rahman (@EizaRahman) October 12, 2017
Communication is composed of three parts: 55% body language, 38% tone of voice, and 7% actual words. How you talk is more important than what you say. Make sure you are giving your partner 100% of your attention. Many mistakes men make while communicating can be attributed to their body language.
Don’t fidget with your phone or look elsewhere, and avoid looking restless. Be mindful of your body language when you’re conversing with your partner. You’ll find that, given the right amount of attention, your relationship will be able to ease out your differences even better.
6. Face-to-Face is Best
Have you ever tried to work out differences over the phone? Communicating through text messaging and a phone call is all well and good. However, rarely do the resolutions from those conversations ever stick. The best way, of course, is to discuss things face-to-face.
Not only does it lend the required severity to the conversation, it also lets both of you pay more attention to what each other is saying. Both of you will feel very valued if you take the time to discuss your problems in person. Try not to resolve things over the phone. Always, always make it a personal (literally!) matter.
7. Don’t Be Afraid
Let’s face it, men — we’re all afraid of our partners. Of course, it’s not without good reason! Hell hath no fury than a woman scorned, right? This might make some of us run away from the fact that some things need to be talked about. Again, avoiding the issue rather than facing it helps no one.
Don’t be afraid to let your partner know what bothers you. Think about it: how can a relationship be fruitful if there’s no compromise? Converse with your partner and learn to reach a compromise with them. Being scared about the confrontations is counterproductive and will produce lots of problems down the line.
Coach Natalie from Love Advice TV has a few things to say about communicating with your partner in this video!
Relationship communication is a delicate art. However, it’s also a necessary part of your relationship. Learning how to really sit down and talk about your differences with your partner can help lead to a long and fruitful relationship. Don’t be afraid to speak out and learn to admit your mistakes. Follow these tips and you’re already halfway to the best relationship you’ll ever have in your life.
Got any tips for us on successfully communicating with your partner? Let us know down in the comments!